M.I.A.

Firstly, I'm sorry I haven't posted a blog in so long. There are so many things that have gone on in the last few weeks that I just haven't had the heart to blog. The overwhelming sense of "blah" has really taken over me for several weeks and nothing fun or interesting to blog about happens when you're feeling so blah.

A few days ago I literally hit my breaking point. I just lost it. My poor hubby has probably never been more scared in his life, but he was so patient and kind. I've been miserable for several months and it dawned on me the other day that I was trying to point the finger as to why I was so miserable at ANYTHING other than the truth. I said I was miserable because of my job, being away from family, not being able to start a family when we wanted to, etc. It was like God's hand came down and smacked me on the forehead and said "No you dummy, you're the reason you're miserable." Oh... I'm making myself miserable. Awesome. So, I've been trying to improve my attitude and accept that the situation is not what's making me so upset, it's how I'm dealing with the situation. That's a tough pill to swallow, I'll tell you that for sure.

I keep telling hubby I wish there was an easy button and am wondering where my burning bush is. I don't feel like I'm doing what I should be doing as far as my career, but I also feel like what I want will never happen. My work schedule sucks so bad I can hardly stand it. At the moment, I really feel like being a teacher is what would truly help me feel fulfilled in my career and enjoy myself, but I have NO idea how to go about it. I got a part-time job at a local elementary school within the past few days and that's an encouragement I suppose, but it's only 1.5 hours a day and that means I'll never have a day off, unless I take vacation from the station over a weekend. That's slightly daunting but I'm hoping I can get a teacher's assistant position at this same elementary school and then I can quit at the station. But then I had a panicky moment realizing... but I won't have work over the summer months! What will we do without an income for those three months?! I'm just lost and feel like I'm drowning. Like the more I hate this situation, the worse it gets, and the less I know what to do.

This isn't quite as cheery of a blog as I was hoping, but it's the best I can muster. I'm going to try and do better about blogging and maybe that will help me feel better. I'm sorry I haven't been keeping up with you ladies, but I promise you aren't forgotten.

Frustration

Today is the day that having no friends really just kills me. I'm bursting at the seams, NEEDING to vent and I can't do that on here incase someone I don't want reading this, ends up reading it. I could scream. I really just need a friend. Is ONE friend so difficult to come by? Gah!

I want it Wednesday

So, yet another themed post today. We'll see how this goes! :)

Today I want a number of things. I had an interview for a nanny job on Sunday and I won't know if I got it or not until this weekend. I'm trying to not obsess over it toooo badly because I really really really want this job. If I get it, I'll fill you all in more thoroughly later. :)

If I get this job I'm going to join a gym down the street. It's a female only 24/7 gym with a military discount. How awesome is that? With your membership you, obviously, get 24/7 access, use of several tanning beds and saunas, as well as work-out classes and gym access. I'm setting a goal for myself. I want to lose 20 pounds. I'm right on the edge of being "overweight" on the BMI scale and I'm reeeeeally not enjoying that. The hubby said today if I hit my goal, I can use a week's income and get myself some new clothes. How's THAT for encouragement, huh? :)

Anyway, that's it for me today. I have today and tomorrow off from work and I'm using it to catch up around the house, so I hope I can continue being productive! :) Happy Wednesday.

Family Friday

Well, my second one of these and I don't even need to waste one second on who I'm going to write about.

My brother in law has been staying with us for nearly a month now and tomorrow is his last day here! It's pretty bitter sweet to tell you the truth. We've really enjoyed having him here. Anywho...

me and micah christmas morning

When I say Micah is EXACTLY like the hubs, I mean EXACTLY. They act alike, they look alike, they dress alike, they think alike, etc. Most of the time it's creepy, while hilarious as all get out. There is eleven years between hubby and Micah, but they are the second and third out of five kids. While the hubs mostly grew up with his older sister, Micah has mostly grown up with his two younger siblings. There were years here and there when hubby lived at home and boy did those two butt-heads. They are both stubborn, strong-willed, and aggressive. (Again, they are too alike) Their mom's favorite story to tell was when Micah prayed one night for hubby "to move far away again". Lol. Thankfully, they are both at the age now that they can tolerate each other much better and actually see their like-ness as what bonds them, instead of what makes them hate each other. (Although I'm sure they would never in a million years word it quite like that :) )

We have really enjoyed having him here the past few weeks and I'm sure for a while after he leaves, the house will seem empty without him. Hopefully he's been able to see us in a new light as well, and know we'll be there to back him up whenever he might need us, no matter how "far away" we move. ;)

lol He'll hate me if he ever sees this :)

Sweet Miracles

Goodness, I haven't made time to blog lately. I've been completely out of the loop the past few days. My apologies. :)

Meet the new members of our family!!

This is sweet Millie

And this little guy has yet to find a name

So, Millie has a pretty amazing story, but I need to start from the beginning. The majority of my childhood pets were found in rescues. Each and every one of them have their own special story that made them even more dear to all of our hearts. This being said, I have a special place in my heart for rescue shelters, as well as the animals within them.

When we first moved in Oklahoma, which has been nearly a year (Crazy!), we immediately started talking about pets. We'd been dying to have a pet and finally had a yard/house to have one. Instinctively, I started looking at shelter websites in the area. Hubby really likes huskies so I kept a special eye out for one and then one day I came across Millie. (We've re-named her from what the rescue was calling her but still) Her story instantly touched my heart and melted it completely.

The lady that ran the rescue frequents local shelters as often as possible to see if she can save animals from being put down. One day she saw a puppy that looked like she was days away from death, either because of her injuries and sheer point of starvation, or due to her impending euthanization. She couldn't bare to see this poor dog again before they put her down so she didn't come back until after she was supposed to be put to sleep.

Skin and Bones

When she did come back, dog she had seen was still there. She knew she just had to get her and bring her back to good health. It had been a sign. She knew that it'd be plenty of work, but the dog deserved it. At some point she had an infection on her spine that hadn't been treated and had done lasting damage. Her legs would get twisted up easily, she couldn't quite walk straight, and running ended up being more like a bunny hop. Her digestion was less than optimal and her ability to know when she needs to go to the potty was minimal at best.

We've talked about Millie ever since then. No matter how many dogs we looked at, Millie already had our hearts. So, nearly a year after first seeing her on the website, she is now snoozing on our back porch enjoying being at home for the first time. We love her, she loves us and she's here to stay. I really do feel like a mother who has brought their child home from the hospital. lol. She's the sweetest thing in the world and is our sweet miracle doggie.

When we finally name our little man, I'll have to post a blog about him, so as to be fair. :)